3.07.2009

Caturday Proclamation To The World

"Hey you, sitting at your computer wasting time, listen up. I have some revelations. Just because your boyfriend or husband wants you to see Watchmen you don't have to. That giant guy with the color of Michael Jackson's skin and loin cloth is creepy."
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"The Bachelor sucked this year. I wanted to staple Melissa's lips together so she would stop moving them around. Jason's kid looked like a spider monkey and Jason cried more than a 13 year old at a Jonas concert. Hey Jason, hows your vagina?"
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"I'm not done yet, hey, up here. This Twilight shizz has got to end. Beyonce looked like a cow at the Oscars. Hugh J. is finer than a peach from Carolina.
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"Chris B, Rush L, Miley C and Pamela A need to be dumped into a volcano. Rachel Ray needs a muzzle. Cats rule dogs drool. Ellen in Oprah out. Jon Hamm is finer than a beach in Carolina. Ok losers, that's it for now."
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4 comments:

craigthegrey said...

Thank you Fatness. This is the best Caturday post to date. (I will be seeing Watchmen - although I'm sure it won't be with my wife.)

Chris said...

That cat is quite prophetic and wise beyond it's years. I wonder why he perches on top of the door? Silly kitten.

Beyonce looked like a cow in fancy drapery. Sorry Big B.

Have you watched Australia yet????

Michelle said...

No I have not. I did just discover though, that Hugh J, Ryan Reynolds and Tim Riggins are ALL in the new Wolverine movie. I shall perish from the hot overload.

Chris said...

HOLY HOTT OVERLOAD. That is too much. I can't imagine Tim Riggins in anything else but FNL. He needs to always be white trash, it's his calling.