I hate those Facebook surveys and shiz. So I came up with one of my own.
15 Things You Don't Want To Know About Me
I used to dress up like Madonna and make music videos in Guttery’s basement.
My high school boyfriend used to make us kneel and pray after making out.
Tim and I go out to the movies almost every weekend.
I had such a crush on Donny Osmond that I made my girlfriend tape a picture of him to her face and then I danced with her/him.
I passed out at the hospital watching a nurse insert an IV into my friend.
I hate grocery stores.
I sat my dog on top of a Xerox machine and made several copies of his ass and then hung the copies on a girl’s car because I didn’t like her.
Large bodies of water scare me.
It bothers Tim that my bra and panties are never the same color.
Watching people cook on TV relaxes me, except Rachel Ray.
Marie Osmond’s 2nd husband used to be one of my roommates. He made me an omelet.
Turning 50 is going to bug me.
I did a dine-n-dash once with my friends.
The older I get, the more funny skin discolorations I find.
I like the smell of gasoline and hair salons.