Let Them Eat Iams

Fatness has had enough! He has read the blogs he has seen the terse comments and he is duly pissed.

I held his sweet head in my lap while he wept, I tried to console him with his favorite tuna water and deep fur brushing, but to no avail.

He asked me to print these words on 3x5 index cards to those who despise him.


I finally settled him down with his Pokemon crown.

He will wait patiently for the forthcoming apologies and gifts.


Erica said...

LOL LOL. Malia, Rachel, I hope you're happy. He is so upset.

call me said...

Michelle I am SERIOUSLY dying!! Sitting at my desk laughing out loud! Now...

Dearest Fatness,

I think that I have misread you. Please let me explain. It's just that whenever I see you, you act as if you are so much better than me. Your owner worships the ground that you walk on. I guess you just came off as snooty, and well stuck up. But I guess I was wrong...please accept my apologies.

Anonymous said...

Dear Malia,
What you incorrectly assumed was snootiness is merely the feline manner. Perhaps, if you and Rachel better informed yourselves about my majestic species you might find it in your hearts to fit at least a furry paw in?

When I next see you I shall sit in your lap and allow you to pet my silken hairs.


Allicat said...


I think Fatness needs his very own blog.

Anonymous said...

I think Fatness HAS his own blog, Allison.

Maybe Fatness would like 2 kittycat sisters??? God knows they would get treated better over there. And Sween would have less scars . :(


RJones said...

LOL! I think Fatness owes his greatness to his amazing owner. I do not hate you fatness, and your stories are probably some of my favorites told by Erica. You are a lucky feline to be so adored. I think you and Gracie should get married.